ladyparts

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Things I forgot:
a) To turn in the form to get 24 hour access to the gallery space
b) To include my name, or any reference to myself as the artist on the title wall (with the vinyl lettering or the statement of intent)

I remembered to order table cloths, but I forgot access to the gallery?

Today when Jenna and I were doing some stuff in the gallery there were two alumni/employees and one student sitting in there. I am not sure if this was part of their job responsibilities or if it was just a nice place to hang out with a computer and internet access. The point is, for the entire duration of our time in the space, they were very loud and “charming,” no less than singing Walt Disney songs and asking people who walked by what their favorite Disney movie was. Meanwhile, as I sweat and strained to reach the light track, adjusting a few lights, almost falling, I became very angry. There was absolutely no recognition that we were in there.

I have a difficult time with very wholesome people.

This is an abrieviated simulation of my experience of the Art Department at APU. I have not been a part of the major for four years, I have no work space in the wedge, I am a specter. I cannot say that I would want it otherwise, I tend to gravitate toward this role. But i was just really sad and felt disrespected today. Couldn’t they have gone to lunch and let us work? Couldn’t the 6’8” person have helped me adjust the lights?

So we went and got burritos and parted ways for the afternoon. After I got off work I went back into the gallery and was overcome with more feelings of simultaneous embarrassment and anger. Matthew and I spent an hour cleaning up stuff people left out. I wanted to put some of it in the storage space in the gallery, but the room was locked. Why did they not unlock it for me before they left? Why when I asked to store my things in the office, was the response of annoyance and disgust? This whole experience of the illusive “senior show” has been very bazaar for me.

I don’t know why I thought there would be professionalism. I don’t know why I thought I would receive respect.

Things keep going wrong. I am very nervous about tomorrow.

This is going to be a long night.

But the reason I am telling you about this is that I really want to try and figure out what keeps us from seeing each other. I keep thinking that the next institution I go to will be more organized or aware. But there seems to be the perpetual state of carelessness. I guess, more than determine the cause, I just want to expose this hurtful behavior in hopes that we will avoid it more.

Test Strip

Check it:

Test Strip from lady parts on Vimeo.

You may be thinking, “Hey, you said there would be no Internet, and from where I can see this is going, there is bound to be a direct reference and display of internet communication.” And you would be right.

To insert a very famous excerpt from Whitman’s Song of Myself, “Do I contradict myself? Very well, then I contradict myself, I am large, I contain multitudes.”

This show is about paradoxes, it is part of real life.

Note: I have really come to hate the phrases “the show” and “my show” over the past few entries. It kind of makes me want to punch the computer in the face. I am sorry if it has the same effect on you. I do not wish this irritation on anyone .

It’s Happening

In three weeks I will take up the main art gallery at my school. I will fill it with good vibes and perspectives on life. I would really like for you to come out and participate. It is a relational exhibition about human connection, exploring what it feels like to interact with other people.

At it’s best, it will make you feel like you belong in the space and have entered a gallery that recognizes your presence. You will be invited to step out of your anonymity. I want you to understand that we affect each other and we are real. When we read each other’s words, they are from real people, although they are echoing inside our minds. When you meet someone whose writings you have read and identified with, it can be like the materialization of a fictional character. This experience can be very fascinating and beautiful. It is one of my favorite parts about the Internet.

Relation on the Internet is not overtly expressed in the pieces in this exhibition, although I had thought of creating pieces directly addressing it at one point. If you come, I would love for you to think about this perspective while in the space.

I will be documenting the process of the show here on ladyparts. Check back for updates, if you are interested.